Stoker Speak… The 9 Words Women Use

With apologies to tandem teams that have same-sex pilots and stokers, or teams where the woman is the pilot and her stoker(s) is a male or children, someone threw out this “oldie but goodie” on a motorcycle discussion forum I frequent and I couldn’t help to realize how spot-on this is for many of the discussions we’ve heard between tandem teams where the pilot was a male and the stoker a female who had a martial or quasi-marital relationship….
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(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting ready to leave for a ride, this means a half an hour. Five minutes are only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to get the bike and gear packed before its time to leave.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually not a word, but a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . that will bring on a ‘whatever’).

(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!

(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, Meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to # 3.

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About TG

I've been around a bit and done a few things, have a couple kids and a few grandkids. I tend to be curmudgeonly, matter-of-fact and not predisposed to self-serving chit-chat. Thankfully, my wife's as nice as can be otherwise we'd have no friends. My interests are somewhat eclectic, but whose aren't?
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